Absent Parent vs. Non-Custodial Parent

I will try and keep this short. I hear many people use the words Non-custodial parent as a negative term. I believe there to be a misconception as to what the difference is between a Non-Custodial parent and an Absent Parent. There is a BIG difference between the two.

My ex-husband is what you would call the ABSENT parent so I have had first hand experience in deciphering the difference between a NCP and AP (what I will refer to as the absent parent).

Most cases involving custody end up with a non-custodial parent. Someone who by legal definition does not have the child physically living with them in their home. This in now way means that the NCP is a bad person. It is merely a legal finding by the court for the child. 

An AP is a parent who willingly has made the choice to be absent from the life of their child. I know there are many people out there who will justify and debate this definition, but I am living the very definition of AP daily and have been for over the course of many years. A divorce does not ever mean that you are severed from your children. They are still your children and will be your children for all time. Nothing can change that. 

An AP is someone who makes the choice to not keep their relationship with their children open. They do not call, write, visit or send gifts. Some even go as far as not paying anything to support their children; but that is a whole other issue. The AP can make up any excuse, but really it doesn't matter how they try to justify their actions. They are selfish people who do not care about the harm they are causing to innocent children.

So PLEASE, if you are reading this and are a parent who is either divorced or in the middle of one don't allow anger to make you loose sight of what is really important. Your Children.