Pointing Fingers and Placing Blame

I would like to clarify a situation that has been brought to my attention. I have been working with child support in Georgia since Jan. 10, 2010. We have been trying to locate my ex-husband but he has moved around a lot and has also been hiding behind different addresses. Earlier this week we got word that the case has been progressing through the system in Georgia. I have been expecting a backlash of emails and social network postings from him and his wife, but I was surprised. What did happen was a backlash at the wrong people. I feel the need to clarify who was involved in tracking down Steve.

I have been doing yearly background checks on him since he ducked out of California (our home state at the time) in 2009. Every year I run several different check on him and his household members in order to find vital information that child support needs in order to file the support case for our two children who will be 8 and 10 in just a few weeks. I have never asked Steve's family or Stephanie's family for address information, employer information or phone numbers. I have been able to get all this (ever changing) information on my own and all from states away.

To me to think of a blended family as having sides to pick from is beyond ridiculous. I have and always will see the girls family as my own no matter how many years go by that Steve and I have been divorced. My daughters are a connection to them that in my eyes will never be broken. Family is Family. I understand their view on wanting to keep in touch and be a part of his family. Family is Family. I would never try to come in the way of that relationship. To me NOTHING should ever come between family.

If there is blame for a guilty party it is the ones who caused the situation. By leaving the state and moving without notifying the court and by not paying the support payments in 3 years Steve has brought the blame down upon himself. It is unfortunate that he has made these choices and let them continue to a felony level. But I no longer feel bad for him. I feel sad that he has made choices that will affect them, but I did not make those choices. I will continue to stand by the decision to file for child support, because it is not for me. It is for my children and if dealing with child support for many years is part of the consequences of the divorce then so be it. All four children deserve to be supported and cared for by their Father.